I wanted to write this post as I often get people who approach me for coaching but are very tentative about coaching. Asking for outside help can often be perceived as a sign of weakness, that you are failing, or doing some wrong.
It is a very brave thing to pick up the phone to someone and decide to do a bunch of stuff differently than you have done them in the past!
It is very easy however to keep doing what you have been doing, getting the same results, blaming others, beating yourself up. That does not move you forward, it keeps you stuck, and your experiences may repeat themselves until you hit a brick wall.
I can speak from personal experience. Like most of us, I have had some very significant challenges in the past that left me baffled, confused and unsure. One of the best things I did was to pick up the phone to a coach. All I knew was that I didn’t want to deep dive the past too much- I wanted to move forward. If you have that forward motivation, a good coach is perfect for you.
How does it work?
- About you – and your view of the world. And that is unique
- Non-judgemental – your experience is yours, and coaches respect that and will not try unduly influence you
- Confidential- everything stays between you and the coach – even if you are being coached via your company
- Not dishing out advice – coaching is not about ‘do this, do that’ – we listen, reflect back and help you set goals and plans. Advice always comes from the other person’s perspective- whereas this is about your situation. Don’t you get annoyed when people offer advice – especially when you haven’t asked for it
- Objective – the coach will remain neutral. There will be lots of questions to move you forward, and help open up your mind to new avenues of thinking, or solutions. We do not give the answers but by being objective – we can remain neutral and use many of the tools and exercises at our disposal. Sometimes when we are stuck in the middle of a problem – we have only one set of eyes, ears, one mind – the coach gives you reflective objectivity.
- A good listener – we don’t interrupt, talk over you – we are actively listening to the words and expressions you use, – we give you the space to offload – we hold that space for you
- Reflect back – linked to the deep listening skills, is the ability to reflect back to you anything we notice about your current situation and self-talk. Without judgement – we explore what this means to you, as everyone is different!
And I’m going to add fun or enjoyment into the mix – get over self-consciousness, the discomfort – what could be more enjoyable than creating the existence and life you have always wanted? I’ve experienced it myself and I’ve helped others manage their overwhelm, stress and time, change careers, improve careers, get promotions, and generally feel more comfortable in their own skin!
One of the best ways that I can relate the power of coaching is through a quote by Albert Einstein:
[qodef_blockquote text=”You cannot solve a problem with the same mind that created it.” title_tag=”h4″ width=”80″]
That kinda sums it up for me!
To find out more visit sarah-j.com.